Dear Deer; Don’t Die Doe

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I have avoided deer all my life. They have made me swerve on the highway, drive extra slow on residential streets, and avoided a street altogether when walking my dog. Yesterday on Halloween I discovered a dead deer on the recently purchased property. It appeared to have died of internal injuries. What are the chances?

I almost became a little paranoid. Somebody must have dumped it here. One of the neighbors? Teenage jerks? My mother-in-law? Clowns?…Anything was possible? I inspected to see if there was a trail of blood or folded blades of grass, evidence of dragging. I found none.

The more likely scenario is that the deer just fell dead in the flower bed in the front lawn from a collision with a car or a metal fence. Oh dear! Poor deer! I call the city for a pick up but the city denies my request because the property is a few blocks beyond the city boundary. I call the county and they tell me they can only pick up if it is on the street and creating a road hazard. I’m screwed for deer life.

Should I pack it up myself in a black plastic sheet and haul it to the dump? The neighbors would think I am a mass murderer! It would look very suspicious that’s for sure. As I am writing this, the deer is still lying dead in the front lawn, bloated and smelly. I need to call an animal removing company because a mortuary definitely won’t pick it up. There are many doe’s and don’ts  when it comes to wild animal removal. I need to do the right thing.

UPDATE

Well….the day I wrote the above article towards the evening I checked on that deer. Only the head and neck was left! The vultures have eaten most of it. I cancelled the animal removal company and decided to wait the next day. The next evening I see this:

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I got out a black plastic bag, placed the remainder there, and put it in the trash. Problem solved! Thank you nature.

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